Not everyone reciprocates the gesture.
并不是每个人都会回应你的付出。
This is a hard truth but it’s true.
这是个残酷的事实,但现实的确如此。
If other people poured the same amount of effort into me as I pour into them, things would probably be different, but things aren’t always equal in friendships and relationships.
如果别人对我的付出,跟我对别人的付出一样多,现实可能会有所不同。然而,友情和爱情中的付出总是不对等。
I honestly think that we should help other people and take care of them because it’s a good thing to do, not because we want something back.
老实说,我觉得我们应该帮助和关心别人,仅仅因为这是一种善举,而不是想要有所回报。
But by the same token, if we’re not getting anything back to sustain us when we need it, we shouldn’t help people to the point where we drain our own resources.
可是,由此类推,当我们需要帮助,却什么都得不到的时候,我们就不应该耗尽所有精力去帮助别人了。
I’m not being selfish.
我并不是自私。
Putting yourself first feels so wrong when you first start doing it.
刚开始去把自己放在第一位的时候,你会觉得很不好意思。
If you’re used to erasing your own needs to look after others, it seems too self-indulgent.
如果你习惯压抑自己的需求去帮助别人,以自己为优先的话,就会显得很任性。
But actually,the only way to consistently and effectively help other people in the long-termis to make sure you’re in a good place yourself.
但是实际上,持续且高效地帮助别人的唯一方法,就是先让自己保持良好的状态。