I hate Mondays. 我恨星期一。

Never send a man to do a cat’s job. 决不要让人去做猫的工作。

Money is not everything. There’s Mastercard & Visa.钞票不是万能的,有时还需要信用卡。

One should love animals. They are so tasty.每个人都应该热爱动物,因为它们很好吃。

Save water. Shower with your girlfriend.要节约用水,尽量和女友一起洗澡。

Love the neighbor. But don’t get caught.要用心去爱你的邻居,不过不要让她的老公知道。

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. 每个成功男人的背后,都有一个女人。每个不成功男人的背后, 都有两个。

Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.

再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚,幸福不是永久的嘛。

The wise never marry, And when they marry they become otherwise.

聪明人都是未婚的,结婚的人很难再聪明起来。

Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives.

成功是一个相关名词,他会给你带来很多不相关的亲戚(联系)。

Never put off the work till tomorrow what you can put off today.

不要等明天交不上差再找借口, 今天就要找好。

Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop.

爱情就象照片,需要大量的暗房时间来培养。

Children in backseats cause accidents. Accidents in backseats cause children.

后排座位上的小孩会生出意外, 后排座位上的意外会生出小孩。