很多时候你只要是愿意一试,我们都可以做到甘地和德兰修女那种地步。小编将这十种方式告诉你,相信只要你在生活中合理运用,一定会有所得。
1.话要想着说
Think before you speak
在开口说话前,确信你所说的话合适到足以禁得起放到社会媒体上检验的地步。说出的话要是过一会儿就后悔,那最好还是不要说。
Before you open your mouth to say something, make sure it’s something you would be proud to post everywhere on social media. If it’s something you might regret later, then maybe it’s better if you kept it to yourself.
2.明白根本就没有一个“对的时间”
Realize there is never a "right time"
“等我找到一份更好的工作的时候”,“等我毕业后”,“等到孩子长大的时候”。没有哪一刻能比现在更好。向你的目标迈出第一步,等待只会让你的年龄增加,不会让你变得更聪明。
"When I get a better job," or, "When I graduate," or, "When the kids are grown." There is no time like the present. Take that first step toward your goal. Waiting will only make you older, not wiser.
3.处理好个人利益和集体利益的关系
Balance self-interest with the collective good
在社会生活中,势必要处理好“个人”和“他人”的关系。是的,你应该顾及到自己的需要,但是你也应该考虑到他人的需求。只要足够用心,在这两者之间你是可以找到一个平衡点的。
In relationships, there should be a balance between "self" and "other." Yes, you should care about your own needs. But you should also care about other people’s needs too. It’s a balancing act that can be achieved if you try hard enough.
4.正确看待一件事之前,不要妄下结论
Put things in perspective before you jump to conclusions
当你和别人闹了矛盾,不淡定是很正常的,但是不淡定时最容易出问题。所以还是花点时间来平复自己,纵观事情的总体情况,在你能正常思考时在回顾这个事件而不是回想你的假设。
While it’s natural to do that, problems can occur when you engage in conflict with another person before you calm down. So take some time to calm down, put everything into perspective, and then review the facts not assumptions when you can think more logically.
5.不要盲目接受现状
Don’t blindly accept the status quo
每个人都在做的事并不意味着你必须要做。问问你自己是否真的想这样做——这样是不是一种明智的做法。通常答案都是否定的。
Just because everyone does something doesn’t mean you have to. Ask yourself if you truly want to do it – or even if it’s advisable to do so. Many times it’s not.
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6.不要让别人的消极情绪影响到你
Don’t let other people’s negativity upset you
大多数人都会被他人的消极情绪所影响。最后,消极的情绪就会渗透到生活的各个方面,最终导致一个悲剧。控制好自己,不要让他人的事情影响到你的快乐。
Wise people realize that they are always in control of their thoughts, feelings, and actions. Most people let others’ behavior affect them negatively. As a result, they let that negativity permeate their lives and make them miserable. Own your power and keep your happiness by not allowing them to change you for the worse.
7.行为不冲动
Don’t act impulsively
生活中,冲动就是容易让人后悔。你没有花时间思量一下整件事情,是很容易出问题的。明智的人都会在潜意识里做出可以让事情朝着最好的方向发展的决定。
In life, acting on impulse can lead to regrets. If you don’t take the time to think things through, you might create problems. Wise people use a combination of their logic and intuition to come up with the best decisions possible.
8.接受本来的那个他
Accept other people for who they are
面对吧,大部分人都试着改变他人。事实上,这是没意义的。人们本来就是那样的。要是你不喜欢,你可以选择结束关系,或者尽可能少和他相处,或者就只有改变你自己的态度。接受本来的那个他,你也希望别人能接受本来的那个你吧?
Let’s face it, most people try to change others. It’s really pointless. But it doesn’t work! People are who they are. If you don’t like them, then you have the choice to leave the relationship, spend less time with them, or change your attitude. Accept who they are. You want to be accepted for who you are, right?
9.封面很漂亮,但书未必
The cover may be pretty, but the book might not be
智者不会被一个人表面上的魅力、个性和好看的外表所蒙蔽。同样的,就算是一个长得不漂亮,没有魅力又没有个性,给你第一印象就不好的人,智者也不会拒绝。换句话说就是他们会花时间去了解、去评判最真实的那个人,而不是只看到表面。
Wise people don’t get blinded by charm, personality, or looks right away. Conversely, they are also not turned off by anyone who is not beautiful or charming on first impression, either. In other words, they take the time to get to know people and judge them on their inner self, not who they appear to be.
10.不要去评判别人
Don’t judge others
除了以上的那些,真正的智者是不会评价别人的。他们会试着去体会别人的感受——站在别人的角度看待这件事,针对同样的事情看看自己会如何处理。像智者一样似乎很困难,但是你只需训练你的思维方式,控制好你的情绪。
Above all else, truly wise people don’t judge. They practice empathy. Empathy is truly putting yourself in another person’s shoes and trying to see the situation from their point of view. However, all you need to do is train your mind and control your emotions.